just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize