to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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