Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
We need to rekindle our bromance
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
