i just wanna soil my oats bro
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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