I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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