You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
