sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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