Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Damn victory sex feels great
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
