is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
