if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
