All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
