I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
