Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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