Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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