So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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