I CAN MOONWALK!
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
