the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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