Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
