oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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