Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize