Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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