How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
this beer tastes like vomit already
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
