the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Randomize