I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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