He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
