tell your sister to shave her snatch
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Mom said you looked used
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
