did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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