I just pynch a tree in the face
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
His hands were made for my vagina.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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