Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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