I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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