Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
