Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Randomize
