Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Randomize