I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Please don't give away my fajitas
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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