i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
