Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Randomize