Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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