im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I think a kid would responsible me up
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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