you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
