My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Randomize