youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize