saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
