I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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