I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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