you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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