your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I didn't shave. On purpose
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
