is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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