I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize