That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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