I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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