"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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